Time Marches On

 

It’s been eight and a half years (to the day) since I wrote my last post.  And it seems like yesterday.

The recovery from that little baby’s birth took almost two years, due to health problems that could have taken my life -- two weeks after that last post.  And then we ran a time-intensive small business for many years.  And helped found a non-profit speech and debate club, which we’ve helped run for the past six years and counting.  Family and friends and health (and more recently, kids in musical theater) have taken every bit of my remaining bandwidth.  We’ve had some deep valleys and high mountaintops – but all used by God to bless us and teach us to rely on Him and the people He has sent us (not always the ones we expected!)

Unbelievably, that little baby turned 8 ½ yesterday.  And she is already a little lady – no “baby fat” left in that face, very matter of fact, and old for her age.

And, even more incomprehensibly, yesterday we graduated our oldest from high school.  She is beautiful, kind, full of faith, a gifted singer, a great public speaker, a lover of books.  She is not the cookie cutter “result” of “the right kind of homeschooling” I foolishly expected so many years ago.  She is gifted in ways I couldn’t have imagined, and challenged in ways I didn’t foresee.  She is uniquely created by God – not a product of an education, but someone for whom a classical, Christian education has opened doors and ways of thinking and seeing the world.  She does not run after whatever is popular.  She stands her ground.  I have been told multiple times by individuals that her singing or her speaking have moved them in ways they have not been moved before.  I am thankful – and hopeful in prayer that she will remain firmly on the narrow path of Truth.  I am blessed that she desires my advice and friendship.

It was all a busy, exhausting push to plan the graduation ceremony and party to be everything we all wanted it to be – a meaningful culmination of this journey our family has taken with her over all these years.  Yesterday went so well – what a great blessing to us to celebrate with and thank all the people who have given so much of themselves to help her mature into the young lady she is.

She graduated with a dear friend.  Their grandfathers opened and closed the ceremony with prayer, advice, and blessing.  And each set of parents took the time to share memories about our daughters’ lives and individually thank so many who have mentored and impacted our daughters.

And the end of our portion, her father and I took turns saying the following:

When we began homeschooling 14 years ago we thought we were going out on our own – but God knew better and sent us all of you.  We are truly blessed.  The loving, talented girl we are about to graduate shares the love and care she has been given.  Thank you.

And now we’d like to have [our daughter] stand for the presentation of her diploma. 

The seal on your diploma says Soli Deo Gloria, which means Glory to God Alone.  This phrase embodies who you are and what your journey has been all about.  We’ve seen you include this in your bio in the program for each performance you’ve done.  We hope you will always give God the glory for all of your gifts and talents.

The motto imprinted on your diploma says: “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind.” You have been educated in a manner where theology can be intertwined with all the subjects, and where you have been free to debate both secular and theological assumptions and apply Truth throughout your schooling.  Our culture tells us the mind is for secular things and the heart is for spiritual things.  But you know the Truth – you know the mind (along with the heart, and soul, and strength) is desired by God.  As you begin this next phase of your life, we encourage you never to put your faith in a spiritual “box,” but to continue to grow as a Christian thinker, loving the Lord with all your mind in all areas of learning.  A Christian mind impacts culture -- and will inform your everyday life and career, no matter your path.  Of course as the verse tells us, you are more than an educated mind.  We have seen your compassion, your strength, your faith -- and we are proud of you.

This diploma represents the culmination of the homeschooling journey we started with you many years ago.  The road has not always been easy, but we are so glad to have been able to walk it with you.  We love you very much, and we are so grateful God blessed us with you. 

The ceremony and the time with those we love yesterday was truly a joy in every way.  But today I looked back at the “first day of school photo” in the post below from August 10, 2008.  And it hit me really, really hard -- gut wrenching tears not only for an era ending, but also for the incredible gift of being blessed with that era with this child.  Being able to walk alongside her, even though the path has been challenging at times.  Being able to have a strong relationship with her. 

Everything worth doing involves pain sometimes – even in the midst of pride and joy.  I am reminded of the Teddy Roosevelt quote, “Nothing in the world is worth having or worth doing unless it means effort, pain, difficulty…  I have never in my life envied a human being who led an easy life.  I have envied a great many people who led difficult lives and led them well.”

Parenting is certainly like that!  From the pain of birth to the pain of letting go, not to mention effort...  and homeschool parenting requires even more effort!  My oldest daughter has also already encountered things involving effort and pain and difficulty.  But she is one who has the potential to live a difficult life -- and live it well.

Hang in there, homeschool mamas…  Hang in there during the days you think you’re messing them up.  Hang in there during the days they get woefully behind or you decide to start over with a subject because they just aren’t getting it.  Hang it there when you think they won’t like you.  Hang in there when you have to apologize (again and again) for your own anger and failures.  Hang in there when you seek, with all your being, the Lord’s direction and help.  Hang in there when He sends your child hard situations.  And realize that this journey is about so much more than the schooling (although that is very important, and they will make progress even in the areas they struggle if you keep working with them, sometimes trying new approaches).  This journey is ultimately about their character, the bigger picture of their lives, the ability to be raised surrounded by a community who mentors them, and the ability to learn all subjects with all Truth at their disposal.  This journey is about preparing them to be a citizen of a “kingdom not of this world” – while also preparing them to effectively impact the world around them with compassion and grace.

As my daughter (and so many others we know and love) steps out into the next stage of her life, we covet the prayers of the faithful for the decisions and challenges ahead.

And…  as I have a decade of homeschooling still to go, I expect I will be revisiting this post when I need these reminders myself.  :)